When you’re in the middle of writing a sentence and accidently press send
(Source: tfwpanymphmoved, via leaveyourtroublesfarbehind)
when im a parent i won’t take my kid’s electronics when they get in trouble i’ll just take the charger so i can watch the fear in their eyes as they use it less and less while the battery slowly begins to run out
my parents do this already…
they owe me $392352355 dollars cash by tomorrow morning for copyright infringement bring your lawyer
if you live with a cat, you have had this conversation.
This happens with dogs too
haters can say what they want about the 4th of july but i just witnessed two dudes- one dressed as abe lincoln and the other as benjamin franklin- passionately making out on the balcony while fireworks went off behind them and half of the party, for some reason, gathered around them and chanted “USA! USA!” for like five solid minutes
god bless america
"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life…You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like ‘maybe we should be just friends’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."
- Neil Gaiman (via realizes)
"you can’t copy my homework because our teacher will know that you copied it from me"
(Source: unshaped, via pizza)